I thought I would write a quick post on how my long distance relationship has changed and grown even while we are still long distance. I tend to talk about all the wonderful things in our LDR (and there are a lot!) but this post is a little more raw.
In the beginning I saw the relationship with my man as an online relationship; our relationship was Skype movie dates, playing games online, trying to plan other “dates” from a distance; basically finding any way to make our online love seem like a normal relationship. I was really excited about all the new possibilities. My man I’m not sure was quite as enthused; he wanted a real relationship. I was actually quite happy having this cool new kind of relationship.
While we had some amazing times on our first few meetings and did grow closer, there were still things we needed to work on; largely the physical and emotional aspects of the relationship (it’s very hard to develop the closeness and comfort level you would normally have developed by now, when you see each-other so infrequently). I still had stubborn worries and doubts in the pit of my stomach. Distance was a great way for me to ignore these things and I’d feel a lot of anxiety when we were about to spend time together (which is not what you want to be feeling when you’re about to see someone you think you love).
Our fourth visit we knew was going to make us or break us. I think when we realized this we decided to fight for this relationship with everything we had and we finally developed the closeness we both had been hoping for. Quite honestly I thought it was going to be our last visit, but as soon as we saw each-other at the airport and he held me in his arms, I knew it was going to be okay. No more doubts, no more anxiety. Things from then on have just been getting better and better. And just when I think things couldn’t be any better or I couldn’t be any happier, I fall even harder for my wonderful man.
It was on our fourth visit that our relationship transitioned from being an online relationship to being a real life relationship; where I stopped being so concerned with having dates online because I knew we would have them the next time we saw each-other. I stopped seeing our online interactions as being our relationship; they have become just the time in between amazing time spent together. He’s not a guy that lives in my screen anymore but one who lives just across the pond and in my heart and in my life. I still love to write him letters and we keep in contact throughout the day, (and make it a priority to Skype each day) but our love is out here in the real world and the internet has become just something to get us through until the next time we can be together.
I can’t wait to close the distance this spring. He has brought so much joy into my life and I am so thankful that I met him. I am honestly the luckiest girl in the world. I am so incredibly happy, and so, so in love.
This is for all you long distance lovers with doubts; you are not alone in feeling nervous or scared or unsure. Love doesn’t happen over night. But if you just give it a chance, it might surprise and reward you in the most wonderful of ways ;).