SO I’ve done it. I’ve pressed that button and I will be on my way to my baby for good in June! I felt a range of things when booking it. At first I thought, ‘why aren’t the returning flights showing up? Oh yeah.’ I’ve never booked a one-way ticket before.
I am unbelievably excited; it feels like it is such a long time coming. We are so looking forward to finally being together; planting our garden together, watching sunsets, drinking tea, holding hands, going on country drives, and sharing lots of kisses. Words can’t describe my excitement, or how much I love this boy. I know there will always be challenges in life and in relationships but we are such a solid team that I truly believe we can face anything together.
But my heart was also racing. This is it. In June, almost everything in my life will change. I wouldn’t say I’m afraid, but this is all just so big. The single biggest transition in my life so far. I feel guilty that I won’t properly see my parents grow old. It’s only began to really dawn on me recently that they won’t be around forever. I feel guilty about leaving them. I am going to Nova Scotia to see all my mom’s side of the family before I leave but I have no idea when I will see them again.
I will also have to find a new job and that is pretty scary. I’ve been working in our family business for the past four years and I know the business like the back of my hand. Starting over somewhere new and working for a ‘real’ boss again is going to be a hard transition for sure! I hope after a year of working I will be able to get into teacher’s college though and I am excited at the prospect of becoming a teacher. Although beginning a real career is also a pretty scary thought.
I also have the most amazing friends (though most of them unfortunately live hours away) and I will miss them terribly. They are irreplaceable. We will keep in touch.
I know the time has come to turn the page and begin this wonderfully bitter-sweet new chapter. I couldn’t ask for a better man to hold my hand through it all. I cannot wait for the beginning of the rest of our lives, and for digging in the dirt, and cooking meals, and cuddles and Christmasses spent together. I am so thankful.